your dreams will be reduced down to breathing, and you will be grateful

The thing about not-being-a-person is: They will say those people and the price of being a person is to nod and agree that yes, those people aren’t people at all. They will have no idea who they are... [Read More]

on 03/5/12 | 2 Comments | Read More

Introverts and Night Clubs

Night clubs embody a mentality that is inimical to my own. That is exactly why I have been drawn to them on occasion. To grow we all need challenges and changes. Putting oneself in an unfamiliar insec... [Read More]

on 01/16/12 | 6 Comments | Read More


I’m tired of being misrepresented. I’m tired of seeing the principles of self-advocacy misrepresented. And I’m tired of seeing the autism rights movement misrepresented. Let me be cl... [Read More]

on 01/13/12 | 5 Comments | Read More

Beyond Introvert Survival: Finding Allies in an Extroverted Society

For many introverts who find themselves isolated, the advice they receive seems reasonable enough: “Get out more. Meet some people.” Yet in practice it never seems to work. One ends up exhauste... [Read More]

on 01/9/12 | No Comments | Read More

The Sad Art of Gaslighting

You know you’re in a full blown Gaslight Effect when you find yourself second guessing your own reality; when you’re unsure of what you really think and feel. Why? Because you’ve allowed someone... [Read More]

on 01/6/12 | 4 Comments | Read More

How far can autistic culture develop without excluding neurotypical people? (2011 redux)

How far can autistic culture develop without excluding neurotypical people? For many years I have been married (to the same guy). It’s obvious to me that we are both on the autistic spectrum, even ... [Read More]

on 12/22/11 | 2 Comments | Read More

The Misery of “Happy” People

Surely a culture where everyone must smile must be a happy culture? Surely a merry holiday must be the happiest time of year? Surely a stunning model makes everyone feel good about themselves. Alas,... [Read More]

on 12/19/11 | No Comments | Read More

The Perfect Answer

Why do you stay in the marriage? An acquaintance recently asked my husband this question. He asked it not because my husband had expressed any unhappiness with our marriage, but because I have Asperge... [Read More]

on 12/9/11 | No Comments | Read More

A Hope For Neurodiversity In Education

Sometimes when I’m feeling frustrated and pessimistic, I get to wondering if humanity is irredeemably stupid. Sometimes I look around at some of the things we do to each other and the immensity of ... [Read More]

on 11/22/11 | No Comments | Read More

School As Introvert Prison Sentence

… When I express desire for there to be some alternative from regular schooling, I get a blank stare for a second or two followed by “Your kid wouldn’t be able to develop properly. He/she w... [Read More]

on 11/21/11 | No Comments | Read More

Negative Charisma

A friend of mine was once wondering what stats we would have if we were D and D characters. We supposed we might have strengths of 12 or so and less than impressive dexterity. When it came to charis... [Read More]

on 11/14/11 | No Comments | Read More

I Hate Cold Calling

For an introvert few tasks can be as daunting and titanic as making a cold call. The very idea of disturbing an unseen stranger over the telephone fills us with anxiety. -We wouldn’t want to be cal... [Read More]

on 10/31/11 | No Comments | Read More


It’s a grabbers vs. flappers warzone. On the one side are the flappers. We wave and twist our hands in front of our faces or slap them against our chests. Our heads punctuate our moods and the music... [Read More]

on 10/27/11 | 1 Comment | Read More

Introversion and Schizoid Traits

Not so long ago, I was dropped a link by a reader to Wikipedia’s entry on schizoid personality disorder. I was shocked as I read it over. I read through the descriptions and lists on this page and f... [Read More]

on 10/24/11 | 1 Comment | Read More

Autism, Culture, & Representation (course description & reading list)

With this supposed increase in autism has come an increase in texts about autism (across media, across genre), much of it volatile and emotionally charged. Our main objective in this class, then, is t... [Read More]

on 10/21/11 | No Comments | Read More

Life After Mass Society?

I received this comment from a reader: Hey this is Adi. I have been reading a lot of your posts and like this blog a lot and I am posting for the first time. I have a question that has been bugging me... [Read More]

on 10/10/11 | No Comments | Read More

Indistinguishability and Modeling- or, To a Friend or Three

I think that for too many of us, we are brought up to look for role models upon which to model our behavior. This modeling is something that I think is sometimes so very encouraged in some of us- Auti... [Read More]

on 10/4/11 | No Comments | Read More

When it comes to development differences, environment dictates when it’s a disability

The other day, the governor of Texas, Rick Perry, commented that attention-deficit disorder should be a “paddleable offense.” He compares ADD/ADHD to having “ants in the pants,” and says that ... [Read More]

on 10/3/11 | 1 Comment | Read More

Introverts vs. Extroverts: Learning

The acquisition of knowledge has a very different meaning to introverts and extroverts. Extroverts: Learning is a means to an ends Introverts: Learning is an end unto itself. Extroverts learn somethi... [Read More]

on 10/3/11 | 3 Comments | Read More

Advice For Children, Unsolicited

Do not trust knowingly decent people. It isn’t their native temperament. They want more than simple kindness, or good faith. They want security, the promise of reward, or to pretend that they can ha... [Read More]

on 09/28/11 | 3 Comments | Read More

Extrovert Success and the Introvert

What kind of life in society is considered a success? In obituaries we see ‘was a great person/parent’ and all kinds of statements, but never do we see ‘This person was successful. In their ti... [Read More]

on 09/26/11 | No Comments | Read More

A Safer World

Over the past decade, the United States and other countries have worked to stop terrorism, educating citizens to recognize and report potential dangers. Some terrorist attacks have indeed been preven... [Read More]

on 09/20/11 | No Comments | Read More

Extroverted Critic: “You Need to Be More eMOtional”

“Sometimes you need to let go man and just go with your eMOtions. You think too much.” What Subtle person hasn’t spent years getting bombarded with this platitude? The critic is usually well-mea... [Read More]

on 09/19/11 | No Comments | Read More

Sometimes it feels like Nice is a Dirty Word.

Being polite is this really tricky thing for me. On one hand, I know that I struggle with being polite, even when I mean to be. There’s lots of little things that even after ages of studying, I miss... [Read More]

on 09/16/11 | 2 Comments | Read More

Inside and Outside Safety

“If you are silent about your pain, they’ll kill you and say you enjoyed it.” -Zora Neale Hurston I think sometimes when we talk about “passing” versus visibility we forget what that... [Read More]

on 09/7/11 | 3 Comments | Read More

Introverts, Social Loyalty, and Social Immunity

A Subtle person often grows up an outsider and never really bonds with their birth society. Not only do we lack commonality with the whole, we might very well also have feelings of resentment after ... [Read More]

on 09/5/11 | 1 Comment | Read More

Introvert Survival: Reducing Your Profile

If you’ve ever seen an oil painting or engraving of two men with dueling pistols, you might have noticed that they have both turned their bodies sideways with their arms tucked behind them so that t... [Read More]

on 09/5/11 | No Comments | Read More

Extrovert Critic: “You’ll Never Get Laid If You ____”

How many times has any male introvert nerd been told “If you like (DandD, klingons, magic cards, x…) you’ll never get any girls”? The aim of this criticism is to point out the superiority of t... [Read More]

on 08/29/11 | 4 Comments | Read More

Round-up: Autism & Hofstede’s Cultural Dimensions Theory

In response to some discussions I have seen on Wrong Planet and other ASD forums I decided to delve into the concept of an autistic culture. Having been familiar with Hofstede’s dimensions I decided... [Read More]

on 08/23/11 | No Comments | Read More

Part 8: Autism and Geert Hofstede’s Cultural Dimensions Theory - Indulgence v Restraint

The last of Hofstede’s dichotomies, Indulgence v Restraint (IVR) was introduced via a study performed by Michael Minkov in 2010. It is the least studied of the dimensions and I only include it here ... [Read More]

on 08/18/11 | No Comments | Read More

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